Before I tell the story from a teacher's perspective, let me reassure you, I felt equally nervous and even scared.
What is it with first tutorials and students being able and encouraged to voice their own views and opinions? It is so hard and why are we scared?
It has a lot to do with how we have been raised and us not realising that we are in a different environment.
Schools and the systems that give us grades instill fear in us of getting it wrong. We might fail, if we don't know the right answer. Add this to us being performers and artists who cannot get it wrong on stage or live on television, then this makes for the perfect perfectionist.
It has been drilled into us and we live up to it for years.
Universities and degree study, however, values our own opinions and views. Yes, we need to back it up, but it is our views. And even more yes, we can contradict eminent scholars.
What I learned as student was that my tutors loved it:
when I jumped over the fear and did my own thing.
When I had my own ideas and backed them up.
When I somehow knew that eminent scholar's view was 'wrong' and did not rest to learn and work until I could prove it.
They loved it and I trembled when it was feedback time only to discover my fear was unfounded.
What I learned as teacher is to make sure tutorials are save places. We bounce ideas back and forth and can contradict each other. No problem - it is just a debate. It is not about how I would do the research or project, but it is about me facilitating someone else have their vision come to life. Yes, I will give you brain teasers to ponder over, but these help to advance your thinking.
So, when you have your tutorials, bear in mind that universities foster creativity, independent thinking and breaking new grounds - apart from our discipline most often not having a right or wrong, but simply different points of views that can stand next to each other.
Fear, perfectionism... these are all topics that I often find in my practice as well. I would really like to expand these more. I really enjoyed reading this and being it associated to the university system we have in place. For example, I also doubt my own opinion sometimes, because I find as a dancer I got used to place my values on something more external, which is not quite right and that also reflects on the dance industry. However, I feel our lectures are a very safe place, so I am also in the process of learning how to make my voice be heard more and letting myself just be in these lectures :)
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